Fracking season is upon us. Have you been inoculated?
December 6, 2011
A particularly potent virus that first surfaced in Texas during the 1990s and spread to epidemic proportions in over thirty U.S. States has now become a worldwide pandemic.
The virus spreads person-to-person but there are cases where people in remote, isolated areas contract it with no exposure. Once you have contracted the virus, you will have it for life. Getting inoculated is the only protection.
After millions spent in research, online tracking systems, studying demographics, planning, and training, there is now a blueprint for widespread inoculation of the populace. Participants will be injected with a weak dose of the Fracking Insurgency virus so they can build immunity. Repeat treatments are required for full immunity. Like most viruses, an injection with a strong dose could sicken or even kill the patient.
The plan for inoculation has several stages. Those carrying out the plan must receive the first inoculations. It is critical that those carrying out the plan not succumb to this virus. Despite inoculation, many do eventually succumb but lavish incentives and much higher than average salaries quickly produce replacements.
The second stage targets the most influential members of our society, reporters, educators, academics and lawmakers. Citizens will be inoculated in the last stage.
Chesapeake Energy’s VP of Strategic Affairs and Public Relations, Michael Kehs, recommends early inoculation against what he calls “a strong activist insurgency.” Listen to this audio clip of Kehs, at the recent Media & Stakeholder Relations Hydraulic Fracturing Initiative 2011 conference talking about the need to inoculate reporters early.
Kehs explained how, Chris Helman who writes for Forbes, received his inoculation when he was flown to Tulsa to spend 2.5 days with top management. Helman was given a helicopter trip to a special pad site equipped with all the latest technology. This inoculation, Kehs explained, gave Helman the impression that Chesapeake ”cares” and that they know what they are doing.
Because they have a great deal of influence over the public, it is especially important that educators and academics receive early inoculations. This point was stressed repeatedly during the conference.
Last week, sixteen Metroplex science teachers received their first inoculation that began with a two-hour instruction session at Brookhaven College. Then they received the main component of the inoculation process: The Rig Tour™.
"I thought that the drilling would actually happen longer," Ballou said. "But it was pretty quick, and they can drill six to eight wells at one location. The sound and the traffic must be annoying for people who live in that area, but if it produces a lot of gas in a short amount of time, maybe it's worth it."
The Rig Tour™ inoculation concocted by industry is given at a “model well site” that is specially constructed and—unlike the well sites in our neighborhoods—is equipped with all the “best practice technologies.” The Rig Tour™ is nothing like the Reality Based Gas Patch Tour© recently given in the Barnett Shale to a busload of solar energy executives. The executives were halfway horrified and halfway elated. They rightly concluded that anyone who lives close to drilling activity would be highly motivated to advocate for and invest in solar energy.
The Rig Tour™ is not the only kind of inoculation our educators receive. Grants, gifts and endowments are also part of the inoculation concoction. A Hearn, Texas Elementary school has received a grant from ExxonMobil. Encana Oil & Gas is holding energy “education workshops” for Robertson and Leon County teachers. Click here for Robertson County News article.
At the end of the first conference day, I had the opportunity to speak with Blake Jackson, Social Media Coordinator for Chesapeake Energy. It was a pleasant conversation and Jackson seemed sincere, open-minded and willing to admit there is room for his industry to improve. I never forgot that he is trained to make people feel that way.
I asked Jackson if he had ever taken a Reality Based Gas Patch Tour© and he enthusiastically assured me that he had toured several times. When I questioned him further, it was as I suspected: Jackson has received several doses of The Rig Tour™ inoculation administered at a Chesapeake Energy model well site. That’s when I first realized that the inoculations must begin within the industry.
What might happen if I inoculated the inoculators? What if they took a dose of my Reality Based Gas Patch Tour©? I’ve given countless tours and, without fail, the participants quickly and easily contract the Fracking Insurgency virus. A Reality Based Gas Patch Tour© is not carefully planned and orchestrated like The Rig Tour™. A Reality Based Gas Patch Tour© might include talking with Gas Patch victims and often includes exposure to the same toxic compounds they breathe every day. 60 Minutes, PBS, CBS, EPA officials, journalists and TV news reporters from several different countries and a busload full of solar energy executives have all taken my Reality Based Gas Patch Tour©. The French seem to be most susceptible to the Fracking Insurgency virus.
Despite Kehs efforts to inoculate Ohio reporters early, the Fracking Insurgency virus is spreading rapidly across Ohio. In many cases online exposure via the iReality Based Gas Patch Tour©, even despite occasional annoying music, may be all that is needed to contract the Fracking Insurgency virus.